When Health Problem Strikes In : Part 1 - Medical Diagnosis

          Last month, after the house assessment, I was all prepared and geared up for job hunting again but something unpredictable happened to me and it has something to do with my health. I was having an early morning conversation with my mother when I noticed something...

          "Ma, nagdadalang tao yata ako,...este nagdadalang bukol pala - me nakapa akong bukol sa puson ko habang nakahiga ako. Tumayo agad ang nanay ko at kinapa sabay sabi." Ay lintek kang babae ka, magpa check agad tayo." Sagot ko, "Ma, pagtapos na nating magbayad  ng tax sa cityhall." pumayag naman sya.

          After two weeks, my mother pawned her necklace and gave me two thousand pesos and she told me, "Magpacheck up muna tayo bukas bago ka sumabak na naman ng apply ng trabaho." When my mother sounded mandatory I have no choice but to follow her so we went to the hospital the next day.

At the Hospital

        My mother always has this hypertensive/nervous feeling that she cannot control when she's at the hospital. I told her, "Kalma lang Ma, ako ang nagpapacheck up." Then OB-Gyne checked up the mass on the lower part of my abdomen and she instructed me to undergo ultrasound and come back immediately with the result. So I went back after two hours and gave her the result of the ultrasound . The smile on my face faded as the doctor explained to me the result of the ultrasound and her medical diagnosis...no beating around the bush just an straightforward and direct to the point explanation. Here are her words to me:

"Hija, makinig ka, may malignant new growth feature ang cyst mo sa left ovary mo, kelangan mo maoperahan agad at matanggal ang left ovary at bukol mo. Nakaantabay ang oncologist habang inooperahan ka para ma-examine agad yung bukol kung malignant talaga. Kung malignant tatanggalin lahat ng ovary mo pati uterus at magready ka agad sa apat na chemotheraphy para maagapan kung ovarian cancer yan pero kung hindi malignant isasara na kita agad." dere derecho di ba?

          I went blank that moment and my tears started falling, I can no longer hear the other words she's saying. I just heard my mother asking for the cost of operation and the doctor answered 120k to 180k. Then she asked me, do you have Philhealth? I answered, I do not have a job and I do not have Philhealth. Then the doctor called the secretary, referred me to the doctor from the charity ward and I was given some few instructions first before we head back home.

        On our way home, I was so silent because I couldn't accept the doctor's diagnosis & suggestion. My mind is in an indenial state that whatever explanation my mother gave me, I just oppose and disagree her. She kept on telling me not to think too much, we'll get through it or we'll find a way for that operation to happen. She was telling me also that it is okay to remove my ovary and uterus if it could save my life and I was telling her. -

      " Ma, madali mong sabihin yan, may pamilya ka na at nandito na kami ng anak mo pero ako wala pa ko pamilya at feeling ko pag tinanggal ang ovary at uterus ko senseless na akong babae. Kaya ng utak kong tanggapin ang rational na solusyon sa ganitong problema pero di kaya tanggapin ng sarili ko at lalo ng puso ko. Yun ngang ooperahan at bibiyakin ako di na kaya ng isip ko, yun pa kayang tatanggalin ang ovary at uterus at may chemotheraphy pang isinunod".  

          It was only an initial diagnosis but it really affected me. I can't sleep and I can't eat right for three days because I can't accept that this is really happening. Some of my friends in fb were giving suggestions like second opinion, herbal medicines like paragis, laparoscopy etc. but I am still saying to myself that maybe or probably something is wrong with the diagnosis but I always ended up defeated with the arguments happening inside my mind and that I have to face my problem and find a wise solution to it.

Not financially related, just pouring my thoughts and problems here.