Sunday, December 10, 2017

When Health Problem Strikes In: Part 3 - Operation and Findings

Operation

        December 1, the day I faced my fear. I was brought to the operating room at 10am and the operation lasted for almost seven hours. Yes, I was in the operating room for almost seven hours and damn I woke up twice during the operation, "nagising, nakita at nadinig ko sila habang inooperahan ako". I was trying to voice out something but they couldn't hear but I managed to move my hands and the anaesthesiologist saw and gave me another shot to get me to sleep again. And when I woke up, I asked the nurse, is it total? and she nodded. I was brought out of the operating room and my cousin who is a nurse in that hospital assisted me and I asked her, " Ate, total ba?... Oo ging, total -nag rapture e? I saw my mother and my brothers from afar because my cousin won't allow them to go near me because I might cry which is bad for someone who had undergone an operation.

         Though there were patients around me in that charity ward that night still I felt so alone and lonely. I have no complaints with regards to the services and facilities in that charity ward but one of the disadvantages there is that no relative or visitor is allowed inside especially at night except for the visiting hours (5pm to 6pm & 11am to 12pm. I wanted to cry but managed to control it. While everyone was asleep my mind is wandering, flashing back all the mistakes and memories that I had before. There's no one to talk to but to God alone - asking Him what I have done wrong or what I should give up again. Honestly, I was kind of rebellious that night because I knew there was something wrong with me that's why it took seven hours to finish the operation but I also knew that there's a reason or purpose why I am still alive. I wanted the presence of my family especially my mother but I had no choice but to pray that the time will pass by quickly so I can see my family.

Findings

          I managed to get some sleep and when I woke up my brother/bunso's already beside me and he asked me, what I want? I just smile (since I can't still move) and tell him, "dyan ka lang muna" and I hold his hands but after few minutes the nurse announced about the visiting hours so I told my brother to just go outside and have his breakfast.

         And then the doctor came,..."Miss. Grace, kumusta ka? nangalay ang paa ko kahapon, ang tagal natin, then I smiled and she continued, "I have to be honest to you, malignant yung cyst sa left ovary mo and nakadikit pa sya sa uterus mo so kailangan kong tanggalin lahat pati yung mga kulane sa paligid", Initially, nasa stage 1c yung cyst mo pero yung kalat nya we still need to find out about it."

       And so I have cancer but I don't have reaction when the doctor explained it to me.I just don't know what to think and what to say. I felt so helpless and senseless good thing my mother arrive and somehow I felt like a little child again. The nurse advice me to move my body little by little and my mother assisted me. Really thankful that my mother was there, her presence at least gave me some comfort while trying to process what the doctor have said.


20 comments:

  1. hi sis. I am an avid reader of your blog. Do you have BPI account? I'll send you some money. It's not much but I hope somehow it will help.

    Kind Regards and God Bless :)

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    Replies
    1. Yes, it'll be a big help. I opened a BPI account today. Can I send the account number thru ur email add (if I can have ur email add here). Hope u don't mind.Thanks in advance.

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    2. Email me at: chidg22@gmail.com :)

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  2. Sis, nakalabas ka na ba ng hospital? Baka pwede kitang dalawin since taga-Taguig lang din naman ako.

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    1. Oo sis, nakalabas na ko. Hayan mo, imi-meet kita one of these days medyo marami lang ako inaasikaso sa ospital ngayon. Thank you sis, sobrang appreciate ko yung pakikipag-meet up mo sa akin, kelangan ko talaga ng mga makakausap para malibang utak ko.

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    2. Hi sis, basta magpalakas ka lang and laban lang tayo! :)

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  3. Hugs. Get well soon, Grace. Let us know where we can reach you. Wala pa kaming 13th month pay, pero kapag nakarating, baka maka-share ako ng kaunti sa expenses mo.

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    1. Thank "R", Trying to raise some funds for my chemo and other lab expenses, kaya any amount will be of big help. Nakapag-open na ako ng BPI, di ko lang mai-disclose ang account number dito for security reasons. I hope I can send it thru email na lang if okay na dito mo ibigay ang email add mo. Thanks again!

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  4. same here. long time reader and would like to help any way i can.

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  5. Let me also help, what's your bank & account #? God bless ��

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    1. This comment has been removed by the author.

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    2. Hi Grace, my email is ayamzon@gmail.com. Please send me your BPI account #. Hang on to your faith, many are willing to help you.

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  6. Same here, Ms. Grace, sobrang tagal ko ng reader ng blog mo. Your stories have inspired me so many times. Let us know how we can send you financial help. Stay strong and positive. Laban lang! Praying for you sis

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  7. Ms Grace, please send me
    Details so i can chip in. Stay strong!

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  8. Ms. Grace, I want to make a deposit to your BPI account. But I am hesitant to give my email ad here. Lalo na kasi naka link sya sa mga social media accounts and personal transactions.
    If you are trying to raise funds, baka best din to publish your bank account details kagaya ng ibang fundraiser na gumagamit ng social media. Mas madali kang matutulungan, lalo na ng mga readers mo. Maganda din sana kung may way to inform you na may deposit kami. Ang downside of course is malalaman ang name mo. I know na anonymous ka pa din kahit papaano dito sa blog. Think about it ha.
    Also, ibang tao po ako sa mga anonymous na nag comment na dito. Hindi po ito reply ni first Anonymous.
    And guys, kung may alam kayong way on how to send help without publishing our personal details please do share. Ang naiisip ko lang is to create a new email na lang.

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    1. Thanks for the advice, buti na lang nag-comment ka di ko naisip na pede rin mapahamak yung mga nagmamagandang loob. Gusto kong i-maintain yung pagka-anonymous ko kasi ang dami ko na rin nai-share dito at halos naging diary ko na itong blog ko.

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    2. Thank you din sa reply mo ms. grace. Nag send ako ng email sa bagong gmail address mo. Wait ko na lang ang account details mo dun.

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  9. As per advice - I created a new email address where you can email me so I can send my BPI account number.
    Here's my email account --- gracesegui17@gmail.com
    Maraming maraming salamat po sa mga gustong tumulong. Buong puso po akong nagpapasalamat. Binigyan nyo ako ng pag asa at lakas ng loob para harapin ang panibagong pagsubok sa buhay ko.

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    1. PS: I'll reply on your email so I can confirm that I've receive the amount you send. Thanks again and Merry Christmas to all!!!

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  10. PS. Nilalakad ko na rin po yung PCSO para kahit papano makabawas sa gastos sa chemo meds and hopefully ma-approve ako.

    Note: kung sakali na ang security ng identity nyo ay at risk, okay po maiintindihan ko, prayers nyo na lang po ang hihingin ko.

    Maraming salamat po. God Bless po sa inyong lahat.

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